I'm not really sure why I'm so shocked. Sooner or later I should have known it would happen- ha! We have been "trying, but not trying" since January. Matt and I decided to stop taking birth control, but we wanted to just leave the rest in God's hands. Matt was 100% ready since our wedding. My thoughts on the other hand were, "If it happens, great! If it doesn't happen, that's great too!" I've loved the 3 1/2 years of marriage that Matt and I have enjoyed together without kids. Now, I'm ready for the new chapter in our lives to start! (sort of). Is anyone ever TRULY ready????
So, here's how it all went down. I had been tracking my cycle (there's an app for that) and realized I was a few days late. We were on vacation in Disney World with my family at the time so Matt and I were secretly freaking out a little. I was positive I was just late. Here I go, riding EVERY ride at Disney from Tower of Terror to Splash Mountain (oops). There was just no way I could be preggo. I was in complete denial.
We flew home from vacation Sunday night the 4th. I was 4 days late at this point. On the way home from the airport we decided to run by the grocery store and pick up some dinner, annnd heey, why not grab a pregnancy test too? Ya know. No big deal. Just throw it in the cart. Yeah, Clear Blue should be fine.
I came home and realized the Clear Blue box had come with 2 pee stick thingies. One was the kind with a + or - sign and one was the digital kind that reads "pregnant" or "not pregnant". Welp, I used the + or - one first. Immediately it came back |. That's right. |. It was neither a + sign or a - sign. It was a |.......Really Clear Blue, really? All this time, Matt was certain that meant positive. I was, of course, still in denial.
We went down and ate some dinner. I drank a huge glass of water. Then we went up and I used the 2nd stick which was the digital one. Once it was activated an hour glass popped up on the little screen. Matt was waiting outside the bathroom. I handed the test to him. I couldn't stand there and watch the hour glass. A few seconds later I heard him go OOOH MYYY GAAAHHD. I was like, "What?!! I can't. I can't look!!" Then I looked and it said "pregnant". I just started hugging Matt really tight like I could not let go. I was burying my face in his shoulder as if I could prevent the moment from happening. I was scared. to. death.
And then Matt was kissing me and hugging me and calming me down telling me everything was going to be ok. And then Matt said "I think we should pray for our baby." I was still standing there hanging on to Matt for dear life as Matt prayed for our little baby. I just lost it and cried and cried. Matt and I both had mascara all over our faces.
When I finally got myself under control we just stood there laughing. I was like, "now what?!". I did not know what to do. We spent the rest of the night snuggling and downloading pregnancy apps and reading about pregnancy and looking up baby names and figuring out my due date.
And that was how the night one little stick changed our whole life.
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